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2012 Reflection

Well, the year of 2012 just passed in a blink of an eye. Really way too fast.

It’s been a year of ups and downs for my family and I. I’ve learned a lot this year. The good and bad. But after going through these, I learned to look forward and move on.

Here’s a brief glimpse of a few major events (to me) that happened throughout 2012.

– During the first quarter of the year, Ethan was having a difficult time coping in school, because of the change in his class form teacher who do not have any experience with special needs children. If you’re new to my blog or just started to know me, my dearest son Ethan has Austism Spectrum Disorder. Just a mild one which is “controllable” and nothing that we cannot manage. 🙂 It was a difficult period where almost everyday, his teacher will text me to tell me Ethan is doing this, Ethan is not doing this, blah blah blah. It got to a point that I was so fed up with the incessant messages the teacher sent me (very small issues which I believe any teachers can handle) while I was busy at work and get disrupted, we set up a meeting with his teacher to iron things out. Oh, that meeting was a good one. My hub and I briefed this new teacher all over again (we do this every time he has a new teacher) about Ethan’s condition and behavior, what are the dos and don’ts etc. He’s a young teacher below 30 years old, have no idea how to handle kids with special needs and he couldn’t “control” my son. I can’t blame him though. Not every teacher in the mainstream school in Singapore are trained in this area. So we briefed him thoroughly about how to treat my son like any other regular kids in his class. No special treatment is needed for Ethan, that was what we told him. And guess what? The messages and calls became less regular and almost stopped by mid-year. Good progress between Ethan and his teacher. And they both become best of friends eventually. *laugh* Let me tell you this, my son is one smart kid. I’m not saying this because he’s my boy. He knows that this new male teacher is soft-hearted and kind and he made a lot of allowance for Ethan in class, so this boy took advantage of this and “bullied” his poor teacher! We never had this problem during his Primary 1 because the previous lady teacher was very firm, assertive and knew how to handle him very well. And now that he enters Primary 3 today, the first day of our new school term, I’m crossing my fingers Ethan and his new teacher will have no big problem accommodating and adapting to each other in class. It’s been a trying year ever since he was diagnosed with ASD, but we’re managing it as best as we could one day at a time. I don’t talk a lot or share about Ethan’s condition in my blog very often, not because there’s anything to be ashamed of (in fact I’m super proud of him!), it’ll take like one thousand posts just to talk about him! *laugh*. But we’re just so grateful and thankful that he’s our boy. He’s always the happy go lucky boy, always ready with a big silly grin on his face the moment he wakes up every morning, always so generous with his hugs and kisses, always so generous with his “I love you”, always so empathetic with people we know and even strangers, always so loving and kind, always have a big heart, and always make us smile. We’re just so happy and glad he’s our boy. Couldn’t have ask for more!

– My husband of 46 years old suffered a minor heart attack on the last day of May. Yes I know. I kept asking myself again and again even until today, he had a heart attack at such age??!! Unbelievable right? This incident was one of my worse nightmares in my entire life! At that point of time, my heart just stopped beating for some seconds when I got the call from he himself from the hospital. I think I’ve never been so shaken up in my life until that moment. I thought of the worse. What if I lose him, what would I do? How can I live a day without him? Well, 7 months have now passed. He’s doing well. He’s gotta take some medicine for life. He’s living on 70% vegetable diet but still takes white meat. He lost about 6-7kg. He looks fitter than ever. Well, I couldn’t be more thankful that he’s still with us and will be with us for a very long time. He’s still a stubborn old horse but definitely a wonderful hubby, best friend and daddy to me and Ethan! 🙂

– I lost a baby back in September. It wasn’t exactly a planned pregnancy but nevertheless, my hub, son and I were ecstatic about it! But 8 weeks later, the foetus heart stopped beating. I was devastated and cried badly. When I first knew I was pregnant, I had mixed feeling about it because at 39, I asked myself if I still want another baby. But I quickly accepted the news with an open heart but only to lose the baby 8 weeks into my preganancy. It’s God’s will and we’ll leave it to Him to bless us with another baby in time to come. I know Ethan really wants a sibling badly even the age gap is going to be big if we’re really having a second one again, we’re hoping we can fulfill his dream and ours too. We’ll let nature takes its own course.

– On the scrappy front, I stopped updating my Project Life at Week 14. I used to feel really bad not able to follow through, but after a while I tell myself it is ok.I stopped feeling guilty altogether. My life got disrupted many times this year with an increasing workload in my job and work-related traveling back in Mar-Aug, my hubby had a mild heart attack, I lost my baby etc, these events overwhelmed me and my energy was completely sapped. It’s fine if I can’t catch up with my Project Life. Other priorities have taken the front seat and I had to give my attention to more pressing issues. That’s life. I started Project Life for the first time in 2012, thinking I could finish the year with a big bang! I stopped 4 months after I started. I do not even think that it would kill me if I can’t continue with my PL. But the process that I learned along the way within that short few months, it was way beyond what I have imagined. Again, I’m grateful for this learning experience and I intend to strive to do better in 2013. I’d like to challenge myself to start anew, regardless of what may come in the way. I’d like to make it as enjoyable as possible, to document all the little details of what’s happening around and in my life.

I’m now closing my chapter in 2012 and I’m ready to take on year 2013 with an open heart and mind and embrace any changes and challenges that may come.

My resolution for this new year? To eat and live healthily, to dedicate more time to my family and good friends, to pray more and enjoy every moment of my life as always. 😀

Do you have any resolution this year? I hope you’ll find joy and happiness in whatever you do and remember to love yourself more and appreciate the little things in life.

Before I sign off, here’s a short song brought to you by Ethan for your pleasure listening! Happy New Year!

vimeo Direkt

  • Laura O'DonnellJanuary 2, 2013 - 6:05 pm

    thanks for sharing this, Leena! his piano playing is wonderful. wishing you the best this year

  • AmaliaJanuary 2, 2013 - 7:29 pm

    Hi! Your resolution and mine are exactly the same! I am sorry you had a hard 2012 and sincerely hope your 2013 is an amazing one! God bless you,

  • Cassandra ChenJanuary 3, 2013 - 12:09 am

    Heyyie Leena! Thanks for sharing and may you and your family be blessed this new year!:):) You have been such an inspiration to so many of us!:) Press on!! Jiayou!

  • EstherJanuary 3, 2013 - 12:29 am

    You’re a winner for emerging from all that 🙂 Also, I loved the song at the end! Tell Ethan it was a great job! 🙂

  • SandyJanuary 3, 2013 - 4:03 am

    Hello there!! I am so happy to have recently discovered your blog through instagram (and project life, actually). I just read this post and felt like we have SO much in common…I also work full time, have a son with autism (very controllable, yet demanding on me as a mother with school), my husband had health issues this year…and so on. Your resolutions are very much like my own. I have a very creative job (fashion design), but I want to balance family life with that and start creating lifelong memories through project life.

    thank you for all your inspiration. i’m so glad to know you are doing well after a tough year. sandy

  • Louise SharpJanuary 4, 2013 - 5:30 pm

    Hi Leena,
    I stubbled across your blog from Project Life…I’m a bit of a blog hopper and usually don’t comment too much, but your story hit my heart strings! Our son has mild autism and it’s so frustrating when others treat him like he is dumb and stupid, they talk to him differently & treat him differently and to tell you the truth, he knows! He’s smart, at the top of his grade in maths and starts 2nd grade this year. He’s in mainstream and is so loving and sweet, but it’s just exhausting when ‘educators’ just don’t get it! Sigh…I’m feeling the exhaustion honey! I’m so glad that things turned around for you and your husband is also doing well.
    On another note…I love your sweet blog and I too want a healthier new year!
    Best Wishes,
    Louise X

  • AdelineJanuary 4, 2013 - 5:42 pm

    It’s been quite a ride this year for you… But you have came out of it stronger and more positive than I have known you. All the best for 2013 and may your wishes be fulfilled!

  • pearlJanuary 20, 2013 - 4:57 pm

    leena, i discovered your blog through studio calico and am starting to read your older entries. i am so sorry for the loss of your baby. i too miscarried so i know the heartbreak. you sound like an amazing woman. i love how you *handle* the teachers. 🙂 i wish you and your family a healthy and happy 2013. thank you for all your inspiration.

  • *Dream Weaver*January 23, 2013 - 1:45 pm

    Dear Leena, I just read this post and I just wanted to say that you are one strong woman. Take heart that the new year will be better and that God will keep you and your family in his care. Happy crafting ~ I look forward to seeing your photos and layouts 🙂

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